Hope ya doing fine with ya great work that ya doing of advicing us people who are confused with these love affairs.
Am a girl 23yrs old, now I have a boyfriend whom we have kinda long relationship we have been together for a year now. But what gives me headache is his Ex girfriend. Last week when I was at his place I tried to send a msg by using his phone i was so saprised when he rushed into me and took the phone by force without even know what i wanted it for.
Sis dinah thats is what gave me suspecious of what can be in that phone so after a while I pretented to go to a waah room and took his phone with me when I opened the inbox I found alot of msgs from his EX I was so heartbroked and i couldn't ask him nothing since he didnt know I took his phone.
The msg where like they are still love eachother and they wanna ge back together I really wanted to ask him but i was so afraid so I decided to just ask and if they would be I would just sufer the consequences.
So I ask him and what he told me is that the girl wants him back but he doesn't want to go back to her that's why there are msgs in his phone and he didn't want me to see them coz he didn't want me to suffer.
Should I truest him or he just lieing to me to get me out the way?He said if I didnt trust him we can call the girl and ask her. But i can't do that coz I will seem to be unsecured of his love.What can I really do my dear I do still love him and I did trust him B4 the msgz.
Thanks Dinah and may good bless u with all the gratfull of the world"
Jawabu:Hello, I'm so proud of you to stand up firm and ask him, it's your right. Pole sana kwa mkasa uliokukuta, how long have been togother? When relationship started....was is soon after he broke up with his ex?
When people who love eachother broke up they need (wait)at least six month or more before seeing anyone else, if his ex is still single right now that obviously she hopes that they will get together again.
There are two things I would like you to know; First, many ex's are still in love with their ex's and yet they move on and learn to love another just as much if not more. They only get over their ex's when you love them more ( you need to know why they split up though, so you can cover those areas). Even if your boyfriend still loves his ex for now it does not mean that he doesn't love you but the thing is that, he can't move forward and get beyond his feelings for his ex.
Second, We (women, wenye hulka) normaly we wait hata kama we know it's over for good we'll wait few months before we feel ready to get to another relatioship, but men tend to move on so quickly to so if this boy was with you to get through his pain (depends on how they broke up)then there is a high risk that he will return to her, since they are in contact. Sad but true.
He said to you that his ex is pursuing him to get back together but he doesn't want to, so why didn't he explain that when he grabed his phone from you by force? I dont think this man was telling you the truth. Trust him, Not.
Nini cha kufanya(1)-Find the ex's number then ask directly if she is still interested and going to try to get him back if she admits that she wants this man back then let the man go. He is not worth fighting over kwani you can't compete with an ex if one is still in love with the other. You would be fighting a losing battle. Just get on with your life untill you meet someone who doesn't have feelings for his ex.
What 2 do (2)-If she doesn't want him back then weka some rules in your relationship,....